AW80...part two!

 The fact that this is my first update this year is just sad.
That might give you a hint of how busy I have been as full time staff of the Around the World Discipleship Training School of 2014. 
What does that mean? Ha, let me just fill you in a bit.
January: Staff training. Weeks full of lectures, questions, learning, growing, praying, preparing, bonding. Fine-tuning our hearts and minds to walk with the Spirit so we could lead with grace. 
February-April: Students came. The first few weeks were about diving in deep to building trust and relationship with each other, with Papa, and learning how to honor each other in community. We got excited for our call to missions. Then God wrecked us with revelation of His Father's heart. Sonship. Adoption. Forgiveness. So much goodness. Then there was the part where everyone got set free from shame and guilt. And we stood beside each other as we dedicated each part of our broken lives to Jesus and honored Him as Lord. We learned that life is all about relationships--first with Him, then with others. This week our minds are being completely blown away by His character and nature, and how He designed every part of history to glorify Himself and to bring us back to this lovely relationship with Him. Our eyes are being opened to the importance and significance of Jewish culture and the Bible. It's so. good.
Each week has brought a new aspect of God. And it just doesn't stop. His love is something we will never be able to fully grasp! I love this Love!
This Love which transforms and inspires. This Love which brings truth and hope and acceptance. This Love that saves us. This Love that so loved us it payed a price we can never repay. This Love is the most precious, beautiful, holy, captivating, life changing gift. This Love is why we go. It's our motivation. The world has to know this Love!

As staff, I have grown faster than I could have imagined possible. I look back to when I was a DTS student, and I am so thankful for how far God has brought me. I like who I am today. She's beautiful. I know this past year of serving in YWAM Oxford has built my character better than anything could have. Everyday I am giving, giving, giving. The only thing I expect in return is Papa's love and grace filling me up so that I can keep going. His grace is sufficient! 
I have been thinking this week about how thankful I am for who He is. 
He is perfect. He is truly everything we need. Each day I see my weakness, and in the times I feel so stretched I am about to break, I rejoice because HE is SO perfect! He wants me to be weak so that HIS strength can be glorified, trusted in, and given away freely. He wants us to receive it. He wants us to completely rely on it. He wants us to come to Him because the thing He desires most is a real relationship with us. Wow. If that's where the joy in life is found, I'm all in. I find myself always saying God, you can have all of me! Every part! I choose to be used by You because I desire to walk close to You. You are everything. Nothing else can satisfy. I hate these worthless idols that consume our lives. I hate pretending that things like technology or food or even other people are worth comparing or are better than knowing this perfect God who has been and always will be ridiculously, mindblowingly satisfying. Above and beyond satisfying. He speaks and stars come out of His mouth. He breathes and life is made. He thinks thoughts toward us which outnumber every grain of sand on earth. Shoot. I don't know about you, but I'm getting addicted to knowing who this God is. WHO IS THIS GOD?! Don't you want to know?? He's so fascinating!!! He's so worth it! That's why I'm giving up my life at home, my ability to choose my own way, my comforts, my stability. I'm throwing myself at Him. He can take me wherever, whenever. I want the world to experience His incomprehensible love and beauty. It's overwhelming. It's extravagant. I could go on and on. I'm forever blessed and grateful to give my everything to Him in pursuit of this relationship. 

Anyways... I haven't talked much about what I actually do here as staff. But I feel like that doesn't matter so much. Long story short, I have so many responsibilities it can be quite overwhelming. Discipling students, helping run a school, planning for outreaches, and preparing to lead a group safely through Asia to share the gospel...to name a few... are things that keep me very busy. It's a rare treat to get a day to myself (let alone a few minutes...). I can see all the ways in which the Lord was preparing me all of last year for such a time as this. I am able to lead well because I know I can't do it in my own strength. Literally the only reason I can do what I'm doing is because He's my help. Thank you Jesus. 

The Lord told me one day "pressure makes diamonds." I looked up how diamonds are made and, basically, it's from extreme high pressure and temperatures. Once the heat gets hot enough and the pressure is strong enough (and something to do with carbon :), the earth makes a diamond. 
He told me that this is what is happening with me in this season. 
Although I am under lots of pressure, it's only creating beauty. 
So all of the stress, all of the missed sleep, all of the giving until there's nothing left and yet somehow finding more to give...all of it is making diamonds. It's worth it. He makes beautiful things out of us. 

So there's a little update. I could write a book with all of the things He has taught us and all the fun times we have had every day for the past few months, but this will have to do!

In 10 short days we will be off to Auckland for a Circuit Rider's conference which will kick off our outreach! I cannot believe how quickly this lecture phase has gone. I'm so excited for the things God is going to do during outreach. If you want to know specific details about the outreach I will be leading, please email me at stephotography@live.com. I'd love to keep you in the loop :) 

Specific prayer points!

• F-I-N-A-N-C-E-S...... our school collectively still needs $60,000 (I personally still need $6,500 for my outreach) Yeah, it looks like a big number. But when you compare the number to how big God is... psssh. It's whatever. 
• That the Lord would continue to set up specific ministries for us as we head into Asia. Provision for places to stay, people to meet, etc. 
• Team unity
• Protection from sickness/spiritual attacks, and safety as we travel
• That above all we would remember it's all about love and not what we DO. We want each day to begin with thanksgiving and praise. We want to operate out of love and not religion. 
• My NZ visa ends in 2 weeks, so I will be flying to Singapore alone to wait for my team. Pray for protection and financial blessing as I'm there...also peace and rest during my few days alone (praise Jesus for that blessing!)

NOW what you've all been waiting for....PICTURES! yay.

Some art I did for our school shirts. Around the World. Our call. Matthew 28:19. Psalm 2:8.

After 14 months of living here, I am just as much in awe with New Zealand as the day I first arrived. I can't get enough. Its breathtaking beauty makes me fall in love with the Creator more and more every day. All creation proclaims His majesty! 

Community living is the best. I love these ladies so much--my sisters and my friends. Susie, Sophie, Judy, and Mandi. <3

My small group--the 3 ladies I get the privilege to lead and pray for and encourage every week. Caitlin, Natalie, and Catherine. They bless me so much!

THIS GUY!!! Greg, my outreach co-leader. We make such a good team. I'm so thankful for him! (We aren't dating so you can stop wondering now :)

Church serving week with our outreach team! We went to Havelock and did some evangelism with Uncle Chris and Aunt Sus :)

This is my outreach team! I couldn't be more excited to have these people on my team. Isa, Natalie, Esther, Simon, Greg, Josh, and me.

Home Life

It's crazy to realize that I've been home for a month. 
Life is getting normal. I can't decide if I like that, though.
Some moments I am so thankful to be in America where everything I need or want is basically right at my fingertips. 
Some moments all I want is to get out of here.
It's hard going through something so drastically life-changing for half of a year, then coming back to life as it was 7 months ago.
At times it's as if nothing has changed... as if I never even left.
    In Israel, our leaders talked to us about struggles you experience back at home and how to deal with them when they come up. But you can't really know how to deal with things like that until you experience them. So that's what I'm doing now--experiencing. I feel like my second time around I will be more prepared for all these jumbled up emotions. 
I'm handling it all pretty well, though... I am extremely blessed to live in a place where I'm surrounded by supportive friends and family and a church that understands exactly what I'm going through. I love that.
    I started working at the same job I left. What a blessing to be able to do that... no big deal, just jumping right back in there like I took a couple weeks off. 
And just when I started thinking "this job isn't giving me enough hours...I need something more", my sister asked me to teach her boys preschool. YES!
   God has been opening doors for my future as well! I love how trusting in the Lord and being patient produces good fruit. I'm not sure of the timing quite yet, but it looks like I will be heavily involved with YWAM Paris and a ministry in Romania in the near future! I'm very excited. I'm still in prayer about the details of all this though. God keeps connecting the dots, but I can't see the big picture yet. I know whatever it looks like, it's going to be awesome!
 Sometimes I can't fathom why in the world the Lord blesses me like He does. But He promises blessing when we respond to Him in love and obedience. That fact still blows my mind. 

  I'm reminded of times in my childhood where God showed me He was my provider. I could go on and on about the many times where He has showered me with gifts, simply because they were desires of mine and I asked.
I won't go into the whole story, but I dreamt of having a certain kind of dog, and I prayed I could have it. One day I opened my front door and the exact dog I had asked for, so precise she even had the spots in the exact places I had drawn them in on paper, was sitting on my doormat, waiting to come in. I'm not even kidding you. 
  Then there were multiple times I had needed some new clothes, voiced my need to my mother, then that week someone gave me entire trash bags full of clothes my size. 
I remember Mom saying to me "Wow, Steph.... you'd better be prepared for what God wants you to do for Him in your future... it must be big."
That scared me.
I didn't want to do anything out of my comfort zone.


Fast forward 10 years or so....
I can't wait til the next time God puts me outside of my comfort zone!
Where is the adventure in staying in a safe place? 
Where is the fulfillment in life if it's not in doing the Lord's work?
I can't think of a better way to spend my time.
I can't think of a more epic life than living out Matthew 28:19.
It terrified me at first, but now that I've gotten a taste of it I'm addicted.
I want those big plans He has for me. I want every one.

Israel!!!

YES! I made it! I graduated!!! On the Mount of Olives!!! How epic is that?!
I can't tell you how good it was to see the other teams in Israel. 
And how amazing it was to get to walk where Jesus walked. 
I feel so privileged to have gotten to do this. It was a dream come true for me. And YOU helped me do it! 
THANK YOU!!!!

Being in Israel was different than I expected it to be. We toured many places Jesus walked and it was sad to me how religeous they've made those places. It was hard to imagine Jesus being there when there are big gaudy churches built on top of every thing. But it was still great to learn about the history, read the Bible in those places, and get a feel for what it was like in His days. Most of the time there was spent touring the Holy Land and having our last lectures. We also had a couple of days devoted to team presentations which was so good.

It was awesome having my momma there with me the whole time too. It was such a blessing that she got to come to my graduation and also get to know all my friends!

I know I'll add a lot more to this post later... I'm still trying to process everything and it's hard. I think it'll take me a while to really debrief myself and get my head out of YWAM mode...

Judy and I are in the Athens airport right now, waiting to board our flight to Rome. 
We'll be staying there a week resting and spending time debriefing with God before coming home.
Pray for me, though, because honestly, I don't have very much money left at all.
I haven't been worried about it because the Lord has been speaking to me over and over that He is my Dad and I don't have to worry about what I will eat, drink, or wear. He takes care of the birds, and how much more valuable am I to Him than they are? He's told me to enjoy this week of rest and trust Him to take care of everything for me. 
So I'm hopeful and expectant that He'll take care of my needs! :)
I want to come home with some crazy testimonies of God's provision. 
Prayers are very appreciated.

And for my last announcement.......
*drum roll*
I come home on August 20th at 5pm!!!!!! YAY

See you all soon!

Me with my school leaders, Julie Anna and Jeremy, after receiving my graduation certificate

Momma :)

Turkey

Gobble Gobble :)
  Oh, Turkey was amazing. What a beautiful country. And so much more different than the other Asian countries we've been in! It's more European--I loved that about it. The biggest difference was the muslim community surrounding us. "To be Turk is to be Muslim", the Turkish people say... and that was one thing we knew wasn't right. All around there are people searching for something more to life than that quote. More than the empty religion they were born into without choice. So that was our prayer for Turkey--freedom.
  During our 20 days in Turkey, my team mostly went on prayer walks, worshipped, and served the community in various ways. There are very few Christians in Turkey, and because of that, very few ministries to work with. The first few days we worked with a ministry called 1881 which focuses on sharing the gospel to all 81 provinces in Turkey within 18 months. We had the opportunity to go to a province that had never heard the word of God. It was such an adventure! We had to be a little sneaky handing out Christian papers/booklets/DVDs/Bibles, and even got caught by the police once... but by the grace of God they let us go :)
   My favorite part of our time in Turkey was when we worked at Maria's Cheesecakes shop. (Check out her website here!) We spent a full day (which was not long enough at all) helping Maria make deserts, clean her shop, and whatever else she needed. Being in a place where everyone is muslim, this shop was a breath of fresh air. As soon as you walk in the door you feel Jesus. I felt like I was in an old movie where the world is a perfect place. The look on people's faces when they walked through that door was priceless. Everyone knows there's something different about that place--about Maria.
 Her vision is to provide muslim women with a good job and a peaceful working environment, and to see muslim people get to know Christ through her business. And it's working.
 Being there inspired me more than anything I've done on outreach, I think. To see someone living a completely normal life, but also living her dream, in an unreached country... she is a great example of what a long-term missionary is. And OH, the food she makes.... incredible. She taught me how to make apple pies from scratch. I wish I could work there. I know I would learn so much.
    The rest of the time we were in Turkey, we walked around many ancient ruins where Christians lived hundreds of years ago and prayed and worshipped in those places. I struggled with feeling like I wasn't doing anything meaningful, but God showed me that doing what we were doing was important for the future of Turkey. We were part of paving a foundation for missionaries to come into that land. I had never thought of the work that has to go into a place before it's possible for missionaries to frequently come and go. So it was a different type of ministry, for sure.
  I saw many beautiful places in Turkey... I feel privileged to have gotten to go.
 The team had a week of debriefing there. I couldn't believe that outreach had ended. I still can't. I'm excited for the next season of life, but also scared of not knowing what's next.
Thank you for every one of your prayers for me during outreach,,, I seriously don't know if I could have made it through without them!

China

I cannot believe my outreach in China is almost over! The time spent in this country has gone by the quickest, for sure. I've really enjoyed it! I cannot go into much detail on here unfortunately, but I will go over some highlights.

Before coming to China, our team was desperate for a shift. We needed to get out of the religious spirit we were in. It felt gross. The performances and going, going, going every day might have been effective for many people, but for us--our hearts were no longer in it. Ministry shouldn't be that way. So coming to China has been very refreshing. We've had a lot of time to spend together having fun, and also resting. Much more Jesus time as well. It's been great. Our main ministry here has been building friendships and encouraging the Christians here. We've gotten to share in small house churches (I preached my first sermon!), we have been to many universities helping students with their English, and we've also played with kids in a few orphanages. The people we have made friends with are so amazing! It's been awesome spending quality time with people rather than performing for thousands and not really getting to build deep, meaningful relationships. 

The other day we went to a place called Eden Ministries and encouraged the women there. These women are rescued from a life of prostitution and sex trafficking and given a chance at a better life with Jesus. It was a beautiful time. We also visited an elderly/mentally ill people's home and a leper colony. It's heartbreaking the way these lovely people are treated... they live in secluded villages and are basically outcasts. But visiting them and sharing the love of Jesus with them has been a huge highlight for me.

So over all China has been great :)

Pray for my stomach though, it hasn't been liking the food lately... so oily!

We leave for Turkey on Monday! Pray for us as we share God's love to the muslim community there.

Thank you, once again, for your support!!!

Steph

Philippines...

It's me again!

For the past three weeks I have been living in the Philippines!

Our home base is in Surigao City, but since arriving we've gone to eight different islands. 

   This experience has been very surreal for me. I never dreamed I would ever do anything like this.

A lot of times I had to stop, look around me, and say to myself "I am really here right now. This is not a dream, it's my life." I kept reminding myself to be present. I found myself many times getting caught up in the schedule and almost missing the little moments that were meant to be blessings. 

For example… traveling to each island, we squished in these little canoe-like boats with motors and splashed our way across the sea. I remember one time taking a mental step back thinking "Uh, whoa. How on earth did I get here. I'm in the middle of the ocean and I can see straight through the turquoise water down to the sandy bottom. And if you asked me to point to where I am on a map, I would have no clue." And then all I could do was smile because there was no doubt in my mind that I was only in the middle of the ocean going to a tiny island I never knew existed because God had specifically chosen me to be there.

   At first, when arriving in the Philippines, I was experiencing some crazy culture shock. It was difficult shifting to a poverty-stricken country. I was not prepared for it at all. You learn to cope though, and live life just like anyone else here. If they can do it for a lifetime, I can do it for a few weeks! 

There are so many stories I could tell which include various details of this amazingly simple island life. But I'll save most of those for when I'm home :)

  The main thing I've learned from the time I've spent here is to be thankful for every little thing. Everything I have back home is a luxury. A flushing toilet is a luxury. Toilet paper usually isn't an option. A shower is a luxury. Hot water is a luxury. I could go on and on and on…

  One week we stayed on an island called Nonoc. 14 of us lived in the small guest house. Filipinos are very hospitable and try to give their guests the best they have. So our little house was fancy compared to the rest of the neighborhood… It had doors, windows, solid walls, a tile floor, a sink, a stove, a table, one bed, and two toilets. There was a water faucet next to both toilets, but other than that there was no running water in the house. The power only came on for 3 hours at night, just long enough to cook dinner, clean up, and get ready for bed. We washed the dishes by filling up a bucket of water and sparingly using it to rinse. And we slept on the floor, along with some gecko creature friends! And you know what? We had it gooood. It was an awesome week. I realized just how little you need to live. We had luxuries in that house that no one else on the island had. Everyone else lives in homes made of sticks, banana leaves, and metal boards. And they're happy! That's what I love about this place… everyone is full of joy. And what's better than living on an island where you can go jump in the ocean at any time of the day or pick a coconut off a tree, cut it open and eat it? And the CHILDREN! Ah! So many! Everywhere! 

  For ministry we traveled to different islands, sharing the gospel through house to house ministry, crusades, and partnering with churches. We also stayed in an orphanage for a few days and served them in different ways.

  Everything was very flexible, which was great. It gave us room to build relationships and for me to spend a lot of time ministering to the kids! 

One night I'll never forget… I had 50 kids gathered around me, as many of them touching me as possible, walking down the street. We were singing some Jesus songs I taught them with smiles on our faces. Once we got to the guest house, they all got quiet and eagerly looked at me to see if I would keep playing with them. Thinking fast, I remembered a game Pastor Phil taught me when I was a kid called "Down By the River". It took a little while for them to understand how to play because of the language barrier, but once they got it, it was so fun!! They LOVED it! As we were playing, more kids from the neighborhood showed up to watch. I spent at least two hours playing and singing with them and talking to them. And Jesus was there.

  Gosh, I just have so many stories to tell… I'm trying to work out which ones I want to cram in this blog…

Hmm, another really memorable moment for me was at the orphanage… we just finished worship and a sermon, and we were going into a prayer/ministry time, and the Holy Spirit washed over the room and all the kids burst into tears. We went around the room holding them one by one in our arms, stroking their hair, praying for them, speaking life into them, crying with them. It was beyond words. Such a sweet time… God ministered to each of their hearts personally. I loved being a part of that.

  Looking back, I experienced some pretty unbelievable things in the Philippines. What I'm taking away from this country is the value of relationships. That is something I want to take back home. Here, time doesn't matter…like, at all. People are what matter. Really getting to know each other is far more important than any schedule. I looked at a clock maybe 5 times the entire time I was here. It was awesome! 

  Also, I learned from being here that all God needs from me is to obey Him. I would find myself striving too hard to make Him happy and never feeling accomplished or content. I realized that I was putting good works in front of the two greatest commandments--loving God with everything in me and through that love, the love that He pours back into me-loving others as myself. He showed me during my time here that ALL I ever have to do and all I have to worry about is love. The rest will just happen and fall into place. If I'm loving the Lord with everything I have, and being obedient to whatever He calls me to, He will work through me in amazing ways.

I realized that I had been spending too much time worrying about the tasks set before me and how I could reach out to people during ministry, I neglected my relationship with the Lord. After He showed me that, I was heart broken. I can't do anything well without seeking the Lord first, and making my alone time with Him most important. The whole team realized that along with me, and found that to be the reason we were having difficulty being unified. But ever since God showed us that, and we repented and made a declaration to put Jesus first--no matter how crazy our schedule gets--we've been doing a whole lot better! So God is good. All the time. 

We found out that through us, God has connected the dots all over the Philippines, healing broken relationships, and ministering to other people around the world who we've never met. I love how God works in huge ways when we do simple things that seem small to us. 

  He's been showing me a lot of other things about intimacy with Him and finding new ways to hear His voice. It's been a bumpy ride, but things are getting a lot smoother. I'm excited to see what He has in store for China and Turkey in July. 

  Please pray for us as we travel to China tomorrow! I can't share many details about the next four weeks because we'll be in closed countries. Pray for the hearts of the people we meet to be softened to the Holy Spirit, and that strongholds will be broken. Also pray for the spiritual battle we'll be flighting. God has been showing me things about the spiritual atmospheres in these next countries and it's going to be pretty heavy and hard to deal with at times. 

I just want to bring the Lord's perfect peace, love, and joy along with us as we press on through the last half of outreach! 

Hopefully I'll get to update before arriving in Israel, which will be the end of July. OH AND GUESS WHAT my mommy is coming to my graduation!! AH! :) Okay I'm a little excited. 

Well that's all I have time for. Thanks for reading! I love you, friends!

Shalom! 

last days in Taiwan...

hi there, it's me again :)

tomorrow is our last day here, then we're off to the philippines!

this past couple of weeks in taiwan has been really great. also one of the most stretching, challenging, and growing times for me. never in my life did i think i would preform for 4,000+ people in two weeks! 

our schedule has been crazy. our busiest day we preformed at a school, then each of us taught 3 different english classes, and after that we had 3 more performances back to back. that's not including all the extra stuff we did, such as eating huge meals with new friends and visiting the principal's house! 

we've grown a lot as a team, figuring out how to communicate and work together to show the love of God through our performances. we've ministered to many grade schools, a military school, a prison, a nursing school, a coffee shop, churches, and more. we were even on tv! 

personally, this has been a time of stepping out of myself and learning to trust the Lord to be my strength. before now, i had never even given my testimony to a group larger than 30 people. now i'm speaking in front of hundreds. starting out i was scared out of my mind, but this has grown me even closer to Jesus because he is my comforter and he gives me the words to say. eating up the bible and praying is all that keeps me sane. now when i get up in front of a crowd, i'm excited to share because the joy of the Lord is my strength! i've found that sharing with kids is my favorite ministry. especially middle schoolers/early high schoolers. i remember exactly how it felt to be that age and my heart goes out to them. i want them to find their confidence and identity in Christ. 

the other day we ministered at a youth group which had a lot of girls who are from broken homes. they're being kept at a shelter right now because living conditions at home are too bad. after the service, we had a time for prayer. i got to pray for a lot of them. it was amazing to see how, even though there's such a big language barrier, that means nothing to God. many of them were moved to tears through our prayers for them. it touched my heart to see some of the girls opening up and asking questions about God. i loved getting to share the heart of God with them and see their faces change when i told them about who he is and how much he cares about each of them.

it's been awesome seeing the Spirit move through us. we bring so much joy to crowds of people and i love watching it happen! my favorite time was the nursing school we went to. 600 energetic young women, ecstatic about us being there, all hanging on every word we spoke. they made me laugh so much. before going i was feeling a bit burnt out and tired, but they totally changed that for me. i get such a high off of feeling the energy of a crowd watching you preform. it's gooood! :)

yesterday was pretty hard for me. my best friend ever got married and it killed me not to be there. even though i was able to skype it (THANK GOD for skype....), it was an emotional day. i wanted more than anything to be home. it reminded me of the story in the bible when John the baptist was beheaded and Jesus wanted to be alone to morn, but instead he ministered to the people. that's what i had to do... thankfully Kaitie wasn't beheaded hahaha but it was one of the most important days of her life and i wanted to be there more than anything. God is good though, and his grace is powerful! he is the best comforter.

this experience here has been one i will remember forever, for sure. 

tomorrow we enter a very different atmosphere and very different ministry. i'm excited. God has shown me some visions for the philippines and i'm looking forward to what he has planned for us there. looks like we'll be constantly surrounded by little children! :)

not sure if i'll have internet connection there...most likely not... but i'll update my blog again asap.

prayers are very appreciated for the next 3 weeks as we do the work the Lord has prepared for us in a new country. 

thanks for reading, and thanks for supporting!

love and blessings!!!

stephanie

In the fastest elevator ever in the 2nd tallest building ever!

Angel and me at the military school

Military School

on a train!

on a train. I got to give a printed copy of this photo to him :) he loved it!

Francesca and me doing a skit at the nursing school :)